We were at Porbander. One day one of my husband’s staff who was senior in the rest of the group, approached my husband and said “ Sir, I read it in the newspaper, that there is a very famous Shani Dham, which is just a few hours’ drive from here. So if you wish we all can go”. Quite naturally, my husband came to me with the proposal, which I jumped upon.
I was pregnant at that time. Still I decided to take up the drive through the bumpy roads. We were going and going and going. Gradually “babul ki jhari” started disappearing leading to the greens as we were passing through a village. Then again the scenario changed as things were getting a little empty around . I was feeling tired and tired by every passing minute. Finally I saw some road side shops selling puja stuffs and could smell oil burning. I thought OK, so finally we reached.
We (Me, my husband, and 3 staffs) got down from car. I headed towards the shop to buy the needful for the puja, whereas all the staffs, followed by my husband walked towards the nearby pond to wash their hand and feet. I looked around and saw the presence of no woman atall, me being the only exception. Only men and men everywhere , all queuing up in front of a small gate. So when rest went to stand in the line, I looked round for a shady place as sun was scorching hard on me.
Just opposite to the temple, I noticed there was a shade with iron brackets kept in the middle, so I headed towards it, climbed the two – three stairs and stood in the shed, but honestly I really felt tempted to go and sit on those iron bars, because being a pregnant woman, standing at a point for a long time was difficult. But somehow, I felt that people were staring at me, well may be because I am the lone woman out, there or by my features it is clear that I am an outsider. God knows what, but those looks made me uncomfortable. And as so many eyes were following me I did not dare to go further inside to sit. So I rather thought it better to come out and head towards the Temple.
Finally, we reached the small entrance. Just the moment I bent my back to enter, something inside me, rang an alarm that, I should not. It was dark, dingy, smoky – smoky – smoky everywhere (with oil and til constantly burning). As I said, I was pregnant, all this was suffocating and awfully revolting to my senses. I kind of apologised to God and stood near a “bel” tree under which there was a Shivling and a very old board was dangling at its side declaring this to be a heritage site. That’s all right, maybe, it was of some importance, historically, but from inside every thread of my body wanted to run away instantly.
After a while when my husband came back, I asked him, pointing at the only shelter in the vicinity, “What is that place ?”. He said that’s a “Burning ghat”. I was shocked to death. I could not believe my ears. How many of you have ever been to a SHAMSHAN GHAT? And that too when you are PREGNANT?? Just imagine those “Iron Bars”, where dead body is laid for burning, I wanted to sit there. And now things got clear to me – Why so many people were staring at me??!!!
Aastha ke naam pe, OK many things happen. We see it all the time in the TV. Not everything is right and most importantly - Common - I’m not part of any. But this … Hell … I felt as if I am tricked into a situation. Actually this senior personal read about it, then gathered junior staffs and roped in my husband because they needed 4 wheeler facility, for reaching that remote place. They all knew that I was quite enthusiastic about travelling and they were right, I took the bait and honestly regretted my decision. Even they were first timers there, so definitely nobody knew, what kind of place we were getting ourselves into. But still I believe, before roping in my husband, they should have considered that boss’s wife is pregnant and she might not be able to go through this ordeal. Or maybe, they just wanted their boss to go with the car and not me.
Well anyway whatever the reasoning might be, it was a hell lot of experience for me, which I’ll always remember. I do not blame anyone, it just that I fell pray to my own inquisitiveness.
Point to be Noted : This photo does not belong to that heritage site. It is from a temple, located in Old Ahmedabad, which I visited recently.
